Release Day! Accident Among Vampires (or what would Dracula do?)

I am happy to announce my next book, Accident Among Vampires or What Would Dracula Do?

It is a standalone novel n the Paper Flower Consortium! If you are a fan of Norma’s Cleaning Service or Immortal House this is the story of the first year of Norma’s existence as a vampire aka her origin story.

Issaquah, Washington, USA 1951

My name is Norma Mae Rollins. I’m fourteen and an illegal vampire. I miss my mom, but new ghoulish appetites force me to remain with my creator. 

Bill didn’t mean to transform me. At least, that’s what he claims. His frightening temper, relentless lies, and morbid scientific experiments makes it hard to know what to believe. However, someone snitched about Bill’s experiments to a nearby coven. Now both of our corpses will burn. 

Bill won’t run. He is curious what happens to a vampire after final death. I don’t want to die again. It hurt so much the first time. Bill thinks his vampire boyfriend might shelter me. I must brave an eternal existence with elder vampires and other monsters who don’t think I ought to exist. Oh and figure out who I am allowed to eat.  

A vampire’s reality is nothing like the movies.

This book is a found family story, clean of profanity and suitable for most. People do get eaten.

EBOOK is only 99 cents at Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Accident-Among-Vampires-would-Dracula-ebook/dp/B08ZFQRYQS/

SIGNED PAPERBACKS $15.00 on my website! https://www.elizabethguizzetti.com/product-page/accident-among-vampires-paperback

It’s coming: Walnut Razorfang has been funded!

Blood Bones & Biscuits: The Legend of Walnut Razorfang has been funded! It is going to be a 48 page paperback or a special edition 60 page hardback. Please consider donating to the project if you want a copy.

For Blood, Bones, & Biscuits: The Legend of Walnut Razor Fang is the story of one small, but bold puppy who leaves home to destroy an ancient curse before it destroys Seattle. She must travel far – across the whole state of Washington and she will meet many legendary figures along the way: a sasquatch, a witch, a demon-possessed stuff squirrel, among others.

As I wrote it, If you liked Out For Souls and Cookies, you will find similar humor in this book.

Paper Flower Consortium: Halloween Special

Tonight I’d like to share:

In this special dramatized episode: Paper Flower Consortium’s historian, Loretta Fabron Onfoy reads from the diary of Norma Mae Rollins, December 5th, 1951. 

Norma is now safe from William, well-fed, warm, and educated via a private tutor, but existence with her vampire-grandpa, Derrik, is quite lonely, especially when his wife and enthralled humans aren’t around. 

After her lesson, she wanders the streets of Georgetown in the small hours before dawn. She hears a sorrowful cry which mimics her own pain and rescues a ghost dog. Thinking she might have a friend, she brings it home, not knowing the danger ghosts pose to vampires. 

Warning: This episode is safe for most.  Mild gore and descriptions of intense sadness, loneliness, and self-hatred. 

Cast: 

Norma Mae Rollins voiced by Stevie Rae Causey
Derrik Miller voiced by Evan Witt
Lady Agata voiced by Jennifer Brozek
Ghost #1 and Workman #2 voiced by Dennis Roberts
Mother Singing voiced by Nikki Burton
Workman #1, Ghost #2 and Lady Loretta voiced by Elizabeth Guizzetti

Music:
Opening and Closing music: Loretta by Evan Witt. Learn More at www.wittynotes.com 

Other Sound Effects:
Heart.wav by frantramp | License: Creative Commons 0
Beagle Howling.wav by frontiersoundfx | License: Creative Commons 0 
(Note: No animals were harmed making the sound. Beagle howls on cue.)
DoorCreak.wav by 0XMUSEX0 | License: Creative Commons 0
Crying newborn baby child 2.WAV by the_yura | License: Creative Commons 0

Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/paperflowerconsortium)

What is Paper Flower Consortium?

After Out For Souls and Cookies: The Fanstastically True Story was released, I needed some space. You see the real Rosie and Tycho had passed away and I couldn’t work on Demon Dogs for awhile. So I spent time working on some vampire stories and created a universe which held the Paper Flower Consortium, the largest vampire coven in Seattle and the title of my new Podcast!  If you want to jump into it: listen to it here on my website!

I created it when writing my comedy-horror novella, Immortal House, 2018. Laurence, the main character in the novel, is seeking his forever home within his budget. In the book, there are four segments when we learn about Laurence’s history and meet vampires of his acquaintance most who live in the local coven: Paper Flower Consortium. By the way, Laurence does not want to own a condo in the coven as, he feels they are too involved with each other’s existences as it is a mix of a HOA and huge extended family.

Also, as a whole, they are often behind in sporting events and he is always accidently giving them spoilers to movies which they keep meaning to see (except Norma who keeps up with modern culture.)  That being said he has been lovers with Pascaline and William and friends with Charles, Derrik, and Norma and friendly enough with the others. Even before Immortal House released, I knew I would write a “Norma Book” which became a series of cozy mysteries. While working on The Norma’s Cleaning Service Mysteries, I wrote six back stories for the eldest six vampires of the coven, then the back stories for any younger vampires or enthralled humans, merfolk, werewolves or zombies who were important characters in the books. Not to mention the Initiation Guidelines and a few basic laws. Then I realized the amount of material, too short for a book and doesn’t belong in the Norma books or even the longer novellas about some of the ancient vampires. Using the questions which fans asked me when I saw them at the 2018 conventions, I thought of what people wanted to know.  Then I did what every author does, I realized all these little stories could be a podcast! I already had a coven librarian, Loretta Fabron Onfoy to narrate it. The genre is paranormal horror, though some of the stories lean towards horror comedy, paranormal fantasy, or even Gothic horror. Episode 5 is really a Detective Story.

In order to keep to a schedule, I decided to do a twice monthly: 1st and 3rd Fridays. I was able to get some beautiful opening and closing music: Loretta by Evan Witt. Learn More at www.wittynotes.com 

 I hope you enjoy the podcast!Listen to on Buzzsprout Spotify, ApplePodcasts,  Elizabethguizzetti.com, or on your favorite podcast player!

If you enjoy it, please like, subscribe and share it. There is a patreon for people who want early access to the episodes at patreon.com/paperflowerconsortium

Kickstarter Update #2:

Dear Fans of Out For Souls and Cookies,

Can you believe it? In one weekend, we’re over halfway to funded! I am so grateful to all of you.

Taste Edmonds was a quiet show, but I gave out all but five of my remaining original pamphlets, hoping to find more fans of the series.

Over the weekend, one of the backers asked me about the REAL ROSIE AND TYCHO! In particular, they wanted to know why I tended to speak about Rosie.

No, I don’t have a favorite. However, Rosie’s actions are closer to a normal intelligent, albeit lazy, dog. I have often said if the real Rosie had the initiative to match her intelligence, we’d all live in Rosietown, not Seattle, Washington, USA, or Earth. It’d all be Rosietown.

Wait, you’re thinking. Not everyone likes dogs. Doesn’t matter. Rosie brings everyone to the dogside. She is eight pounds of hedonistic cuteness with the full knowledge of Jedi-mindtricks. If she thinks you don’t like dogs, she’ll sit and stare at you until you pick her up. (And people always do.) The biggest toughest men melt under her gaze and start speaking to her in babytalk. She had one of my hiking buddies carry her for eight miles. Tycho rings the bell when Rosie needs to go out. This is why in the comic, she is the leader.

When I tell stories about Tycho, the stories just get weird. This weirdness inspired parts of the comic in the first place. Lord Fluffcakes is inspired by the Hide-a-squirreldog puzzle which Tycho loved as a puppy. (Follow the link if you want to see a non-creepy dog toy.)

Though Tycho enjoys a day at the beach or quiet hike, he is the ultimate lover of home, hearth, and his puzzle toys. He loves Rosie, my husband and I with an undying devotion and we love him. He wants us all to be safe. Preferably in the same room. He also wants the people and dogs he has adopted in the same room with him. One of his little quirks is Tycho leaves maddening elusive messages in shapes around the house. Here is one of them.

What does it mean? 3 or M or W? Or could it mean: Three monsters invading from the west?
What does it mean? 3 or M or W? Or could it mean: Three monsters invading from the west?

This strange message is close to his dish, but sometimes he carries his messages into the living room or spread across the kitchen floor. Does the change of location mean anything? I don’t know. When Rosie gets hungry she will eat the messages which Tycho has left. Are they hiding something? 

This inspired the use of the dog dish to speak to the big boss.

Issue 2, Page 17
Issue 2, Page 17

 

Tycho, the furry enigma
Tycho, the furry enigma
 If you are wondering if you should give to the Kickstarter, please do! We are only $187 away from funding.

Love Out For Souls & Cookies? Help Fund the Graphic Novel!

I am running a Kickstarter for the long awaited Out For Souls & Cookies Graphic Novel which will include the 5 original issues plus an exclusive brand new story inside! It will be a 136 page, full color graphic novel. My goals are really just to presell the graphic novel and make it the best it can be.

OFSC_FrontCover

Cover for Graphic Novel!

Out for Souls and Cookies is an ALL AGES comic series about two demons who tire of stealing souls. However, Hell has no retirement plan. So they disguise themselves as poodles and move to Seattle where people will take care of them.

The first goal of $500 is to just pre-sell as many copies as I can, but I do have stretch goals …

Stretch Goal of $5000 ???

For more informaiton, click on the cover or the link is below: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/129641212/out-for-souls-and-cookies-graphic-novel

Want to win a copy of The War Ender’s Apprentice?

 

    Goodreads Book Giveaway

        The War Ender's Apprentice by Elizabeth Guizzetti

          The War Ender’s Apprentice

          by Elizabeth Guizzetti

            Giveaway ends January 13, 2018.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter Giveaway

The War Ender’s Apprentice Blog Tour!

 

Hey everyone, it’s time for another blog tour

December 10 – RABT Book Tours – Kick Off

December 11 – Laurie’s Thoughts and Reviews – Guest Post: Room Tour! Check out how I turned my closet into a writing area 🙂

December 12 – Books, Dreams, Life – Spotlight

December 13 – Evermore Books – Excerpt

December 14 – Cloe Michaels Reads – Guest Post: My Writing Process! I discuss my seven step writing process or how I finish a novel.

December 15 – Mello and June – Spotlight

December 18 – A Life Through Books – Interview

December 19 – Texas Book Nook – Review

December 20 – Celebrating Authors – Spotlight

December 21 – Stephanie’s Book Reviews – Spotlight

December 22 – Book Addict – Spotlight

December 23 – Chosen By You Book Club – Excerpt

December 26 – Tea Time and Books – Spotlight

December 27 – Jazzy’s Book Reviews – Spotlight

December 28 – Logikal Blog – Spotlight

December 29 – The Avid Reader – Excerpt

December 30 – Bound 2 Escape – Spotlight

January 2 – The Indie Express – Review

January 3 – Novel News Network – Review

January 5 – RABT Book Tours – Wrap Up

 

Contact Links

Website 

Facebook

Twitter

I will be at Orycon

Friends in Portland,

This Saturday, I will be in Orycon, Oregon’s fan run, annual science fiction/fantasy convention, speaking on panels and giving away 15 review copies of my latest novella, The War Ender’s Apprentice

This year’s Guests of Honor:

Timothy Zahn  |  Briana Lawrence (Brichibi Cosplays) and Jessica Walsh (Snow Tigra)   
Solovox | David Boop  |  Sarah Clemens

My schedule is:

How to market your comic Wenatchee – 166 Parlor Sat Nov 18 3:00pm-4:00pm If you’re indie, you’ve gotta learn how to market yourself. So how do you do that? Where do you start? Brandon Seifert, Robert B McMonigal, Barry Deutsch, Elizabeth Guizzetti
Freaking Me Out, Not Grossing Me Out Wenatchee – 166 Parlor Sat Nov 18 5:00pm-6:00pm Are intense descriptions of bloody death and torture really necessary to scare the pants off your audience? Discussion on how to horrify without all the gory details. Diana Pharaoh Francis, Alan M. Clark, Josh Vogt, Laura Anne Gilman, Elizabeth Guizzetti, The Pulp Stage
The Artist`s Studio Art Show Foyer Sat Nov 18 6:00pm-7:00pm What are the ingredients for a space that is inspiring and comfortable to work in. How big, how bright, how busy? Bring photos to share! Durlyn Larson, Leslie Kreher, John R. Gray III, Elizabeth Adams, Vandy H. Hall, Elizabeth Guizzetti
Healers, Shamans & Clerics, Oh My! Lovejoy Sat Nov 18 7:00pm-8:00pm Medicine in fantasy novels. Is there really an herb for everything? Elizabeth Guizzetti, Rory Miller, Irene Radford, S. B. Sebrick, Judith R. Conly

What is a trunk novel? The Story of The Martlet

So after posting about The War Ender’s Apprentice last week, I got a few questions and specifically the one I am going to answer is What is a trunk novel? (Or more specifically: why the hell did you keep a decent novel in your back pocket in the days of self publishing?)

The definitions of a trunk novel are: 1) a non-publishable novel the author finished early in their writing career (2) a novel they never sold.

The original The Martlet novel was both. It was inspired by a short story I wrote while I was waiting to hear back from publishers about Other Systems back in 2011. I sent it to a literary magazine who rejected it, but gave me a long feedback letter. They loved it, but felt like it was part of a novel. Specifically they loved the idea of the central character: a person who stops wars before they get started and they loved the relationships that I showed. So I sat down and wrote the novel using my drafting process.

Roark

Original Character Sketch of Lord Roark 

I originally thought this was a swashbuckling adventure book with mass market appeal so I sent it out to publishers. The rejections started piling up from big and small publishers–including 48Fourteen who published Other Systems. Only one small publishing company showed any interest, but I hesitated and the opportunity was gone.

I sent The Martlet to beta readers, the overall feedback I got was that everyone loved the characters, but felt the A plot and B plot was overly complicated. Thinking there was something wrong with the beginning, I wrote a new beginning. And I tried to smooth out the A Plot, by adding shorter adventures so the characters could solve things while continuing to work on the big plot which takes years. (Yep, I literally made it even more episodic!)

SIDE NOTE: if The Martlet was my only project I might have come to the conclusion to break up the novel earlier, but during this time, I also finished the third book in Faminelands, the final episodes of Out for Souls and Cookies, I wrote and 48Fourteen published The Light Side of the Moon, I wrote and self-published The Grove, and I spent six months collaborating with Jennifer Brozek on the graphic novel version of her short story The Prince of Artemis V for which we’re shopping for a publisher right now

However, The Martlet kept calling. Between projects, I’d work on it. Try to see if I could clean up the prose or add a chapter here or there. I added a frame story at one point. I sent it to other beta readers.

I couldn’t turn away from the central cast of characters, especially Roark. I wanted to publish it so it would stop haunting me, yet I knew I would regret publishing it too early.

With every project under my belt, I learn another lesson and The Martlet was now screaming at a fever pitch in the back of my mind. So I started fresh. Now I don’t want to give too much away, but I noticed there was no inciting incident which starts Roark on his path, because it happened when he was much younger than he is in the original novel.

These two points are from Roark’s Background:

Age 13 – 19: During Roark’s apprenticeship, he sees his master [Alana] pulled two ways. Her Martlet vows and her War Ender vows. Personally, he is tired of her do-gooding, when she is breaking laws to do it. 

Age 16: Alana rescues Eohan from a slave ship due to “one of her more idiotic” visions.

This is from Eohan’s Background:

Age 18: Alana rescues [Eohan] from a slave ship. Though unsure about Alana’s methods and Roark’s instincts, the young men become friends.

I started asking myself about other things readers would want to know, like why/how were Eohan and Kian enslaved. If slavery exists: what does that mean for the societies in this book? And where do the War Ender’s come in? Why would a society stop wars, but turn a blind eye to the atrocity of slavery?

Now if these pieces were additions to a novel, The Martlet would become another longer work. As an author and artist, I am always trying to challenge myself. If the problem is that it’s episodic, then I should turn it into interconnected episodes!

What might be a good novel might become a series of epic novellas!

The War Ender's Apprentice copyNow that The War Ender’s Apprentice is out, I have a little more to do with The Assassin’s Twisted Path before I send it to the editor in early January.

Long story short: Though I tend to be a “let’s get it done” type author, sometimes just getting it done isn’t the answer. I needed time to explore the work and discover it’s potential. I’m glad I took that time.

If anyone is pushing you to publish a work, you know isn’t ready, don’t listen. Stick it aside, and work on another project.  Or stick it out and figure out what’s wrong.

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